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ArseEnders - Theme For An Imaginary Soap

You know we can't stand each other but we live in the same street
We whinge and whine and moan as if we've got nothing to eat
And none of us have got the sense to move right out of here
And so we'll wander down the pub because it's so damn near.

Maybe for a change I think I'll pop into the caff.
Or perhaps the corner shop might be good for a laugh
But no matter where you go you'll never find a friend
'Cos when the chips are down you know you live at life's arse end.

Mike Stools (b. 1962)